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If you report to an airport,
or you resort to a seaport.
You’ll come across border control,
and that can often take its toll.
I know these people do their best,
but it can put us to the test.
We can do without this strain,
along with ostomies and pain.
With all the gear that we must take,
just so we can take a break.
No wonder we can feel real sore
at what these people have in store.
If they prod and poke and frisk,
it is no joke and poses risk.
A stoma is not something to
do what customs people do.
I think their take is to look for
those who try to break the law.
So if you’re not that way intent,
there’s nothing for them to prevent.
If you’re a cool, calm ostomate,
you’ll probably cooperate.
And if you do the customs might,
let you through and treat you right.
But if you’re tired and upset,
that might not be what customs get.
May I suggest that you try to
portray to them the best of you.
If customs aren’t content with that,
give them the contents with a splat.
Make sure you serve them all the smell,
as they’ll deserve all that as well.
Reproduced by kind permission of Bill Withers.
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